Friday, January 8, 2010

Heavy heart.

I am missing my pumpkin terribly today.  We are currently in an overtime status at work, so even if I wanted to leave (pending any emergency), I cannot use any time off to leave today to go get her early, and squelge any extra mommy love time with her.  Today when I dropped her off at Daycare, when I started to hand her to our care provider, she turned back towards me, and tried to snuggle in closer to my chest.  Literally, my heart broke right there in a million pieces, and I started to well up after I left.  That turned into a full cry once I hit the car, and contemplated just turning around and running into rescue her, so we could snuggle cuddle all day.  I miss her so much lately, it's really hard.  She seems to need me more lately, as she is going through this seperation anxiety, and I desperately want to be that comfort for her.  I just can't, and it breaks my heart, and makes me feel like a horrible mom.  I just hope she's doing alright, and that the days go quicker for her than they do for me.

Hi, I'm Nikolina!

What's that you say?  You want me to smile?

This couch is yummy!

You want me to smile, when, Oh, about, now

Happy Face!

Kind of Sad Face.

Found some fuzz.

What is that piece of fuzz?

I love babies in tights. Don't you?

On her tippy toes.

Sweetie Cakes.

Sweetie Cheeks.


Hi, little Pumpkin, Love you, miss you.  You have my heart.


  1. Awww I know this feeling all too well!

    But it'll pass! Which may be even sadder in a way!

    My son has grown to adore his daycare! His friends there adore him, as well. I had two weeks off during the holidays and by the time it was over, he told me that he couldn't wait to be with his friends again!

    I think it gets easier when they reach school age...then the mommy guilt of not being with them subsides because they have to be at have no choice to be apart...but when they're so little...

    yes, it's hard!


  2. She is sooo cute! Our girls are really close in age! Raleigh will be one in February!

  3. Hey! HAppy SITS Saturday Sharefest!
    I don't have a baby of my own yet, I can only imagine what it would be like to have to spend so much time away from your child. My mom had to have my sister and I in daycare, she must have felt the same way as you some days.

  4. she is so beautiful and so super sweet!!! Have a great weekend!!

  5. Your blog is just precious and so is ur daughter!